How I wish he were here to blow those candles out! It will be a celebration all the same, as our family recalls Kansas City's favorite butcher and the man we called our beloved father.




Check out one of my favorite Dad moments at John Bichelmeyer - Words of Wisdom and other ways his legacy lives on at our updated website MaryBLucas.com

Happy clicking.......and Happy Birthday Dad.

"To live in hearts we leave behind is not to die,"

Hello to each and every one of you! Summertime......and the livin' is easy. Famous song lyrics by the legendary George Gershwin. If George could see my summertime schedule, he might be singing a different tune entirely! So much going on, and so long since we've communicated with you. Let me take a few minutes to share some recent highlights as to what's been happening with "Lunchmeat & Life Lessons." London Calling: I've just returned from a trip across the pond, where I was honored to speak at the CIETT 2012 World Employment Conference. This was an incredible global event, as 28 different countries were represented in the worldwide recruitment industry. I gave two presentations during the conference and audience feedback was so high I nearly floated back home on it rather than boarding an airplane for the return trip. Even better? I think my appearances have opened avenues for even more globetrekking in the future. Cheers to that possibility! Crossroads Hospice: I was asked by the earthly angels of the Crossroads Hospice community to speak to their compassionate organization recently. I was honored that close to 400 attendees listened to me as I shared the Butcher's Wisdom with medical professionals who provide comfort and dignity to those in their final days, who then share his stories with their patients. Incredible, isn't it? That the common sense approach to life my father championed also resonates among those who have so little time left to live it. An enduring legacy I am always grateful to share. Lunchmeat Legion Book Clubs: I am getting more and more emails lately sharing how Lunchmeat is making the book club circles in living rooms and board rooms all over the country. One of my favorites? A spunky group of retiree readers who regularly gather to share books and discuss them. I was charmed and captivated when I received a recent letter from one of those readers who shared a member comment about my book. A retired psychologist was asked to give her perspective on "Lunchmeat and Life Lessons," and she had this to say: "Thank God Mary Lucas didn't write this when I was still in practice or I would have never had another patient!" Imagine that! And proof positive that it's never to late to be learning. Finally, Happy Father's Day to all the Dad's out there doing their best each day to raise our next generation. You know who you are, and here's to a job well done. There's a special Dad in my own home that I'd like to thank for giving me the two greatest gifts of my life, my sons Chase and Nick. Happy Father's Day, Scott. Well, friends, that's a Lunchmeat Wrap. As we find ourselves immersed in the busyness of June, July and August, I hope you'll take a moment to catch some fireflies, swing in a backyard hammock and treat yourself to some lemonade. The home made kind, because summertime livin' is as tasty as it ever gets. Cheers! Mary Mary B. Lucas Office: 913-671-7974 Cell: 913-269-8222 Email: Mary@MaryBLucas.com Website: www.MaryBLucas.com Tribute Center: www.HeartsWeLeaveBehind.com # # #

 It's never to late to live happily ever after. 

"A Mother is the only person on earth who can divide her love among ten children and yet each child have all her love."

Do you know the Number One reason a person stays with their job? Do you know the Number One reason a person leaves their job? (Here's a hint:  Both questions have the same answer!)

Cue the drum roll, please.  The answer? Their boss.

I shared that fun fact at a recent speaking engagement and a visiting psychologist later stopped me to chat.  She asked me this:  “Do you know the Number One reason a person stays in their marriage?  And do you know the Number One reason people leave their marriage? The answer to both questions is their spouse."

Turns out things are no different at work or at home. Positive relationships with people you spend time with is crucial to your commitment to them.  But it's not just that person's presence that instills this dedication:  It's how they make you feel when you are with them.

I recall a story from noted business author and speaker Tom Peters called "The Million Dollar Mistake" that dramatizes this very point.  Mike worked at a bank and was given 18 months and one million dollars to develop a very important company project.  However, at the end of that schedule, the project failed to successfully deliver the anticipated results.

Mike was called in to a meeting with his boss, and felt certain he was to be terminated.

“I'm sure you intend to fire me,” Mike reluctantly said to his boss. “You gave me a huge assignment that cost the bank a lot of money and I basically blew it. I’ll go pack my things.”

As Mike turned his back and began to retreat from the office, his boss’s words stopped him.

“Are you kidding me?” the boss said.  The boss stood up, hands firmly placed on his desk.

“I just spent a million dollars on your education, " he said. "I’m not going to fire you. I’m going to promote you. I don’t want you taking elsewhere the knowledge and experience you've gained working on this project. I believe in you Mike. Now, get back to work. You have lots to do.”

Can you imagine what shifted in Mike’s mindset after hearing those words from his boss? Just when he thought he had made the biggest mistake of his life, he is given a promotion!  Even though the million dollars was not successfully utilized, his boss saw it from a completely different perspective. Despite what the employee perceived to be his colossal failure, his boss saw otherwise. To him, it was money well spent.

Because of his boss, Mike would now focus on giving his best to his employer. No doubt that million dollars would be returned exponentially in countless ways in the years ahead.

More importantly, Mike would most likely change his perspective on treating those under his responsibility, choosing to see the positive side of negative situations in all of his subsequent business encounters. For Mike, this was a genuine lesson in not only bringing out the best in another, but in how to be a great boss. Mike had learned how to confidently turn stumbling blocks into stepping stones.

When you bring out the best in others, their natural inclination is to do their best for you. They want to learn from you, be with you and buy from you. It works, time and time again. 


Let me hear your stories.  And please remember to connect with me on Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, YouTube and of course my website.  Thanks for reading!

My dad was fond of reminding each of his ten children that the world didn't really revolve around us.  He'd sit back, smile, and so lovingly say, "When you’re all wrapped up in yourself, you make a damn small package."

Have you ever noticed how so many people seem to pursue happiness? They work tirelessly to achieve something that seems just barely beyond their grasp, thinking to themselves, "If only I can reach this goal or make this amount of money or lose ten pounds......I will have happiness."

As they task and toil, working themselves past fatigue, people often rationalize that their efforts are the necessary requirements to finally reach the state of happiness. Silly people.

I don’t know about you, but I have yet to see a road sign that points me directly to Happiness.  I've never seen it on a map, nor do I expect to input any certain coordinates into my GPS and hope that the wonders of technology will lead me to this desired destination.  (But I've come close:  Go to Maui and turn left!) 

My question remains, then: How do you find the road leading to happiness? I regret to inform you that there is no road, no path. You just can’t take off to find a place when you are already there.

Yes, you are already there. Open up your eyes and wake up your heart. Happiness has always been inside of you.  You won’t find it outwardly. You can only look inwardly. It’s been there all along. Perhaps it has been dormant for some time, crowded out by life's complexities and stressors.  But it’s there, just begging to get back to work for you and create a more meaningful, productive, abundant life.

Happiness is not a place just beyond the next horizon, or somewhere over the rainbow.  It doesn't exist in the future, it exists now.  It is a state of internal being, and one that you can tap into 24/7. Once you understand that you can exist in the ambiance of such a positive and uplifting feeling, happiness becomes your essence. YOU are happiness.  Look in the mirror. I guarantee that when you listen to your heart and open up your mind, you will realize that happiness has been staring back at you all along.

Your responsibility, however, is to recognize it, live it and share it with others. Here's to finding yours!

Wisdom that Works

Typically when a writer begins to take pen to paper, or, in this case, fingers to keyboard, inspiration is not only delivered to a potential audience, but it is delivered unto ourselves, from a deeper place within that we knew existed, but into which we rarely tapped.

Inspiration is also drawn from those with whom we have shared our story, and it is those connections I have made in my journey since publishing “Lunchmeat & Life Lessons,” that have become the catalyst behind this post and my next book.

While I fully anticipated that my life would most likely take on some interesting changes after publishing “Lunchmeat”, I really did not understand the depth of those changes and how they would dramatically alter the landscape of my life.

The wit and wisdom my father dispensed to me all of my life has helped shape and define who I am, and what a gift that has been. However, those same words… those same philosophies… are now reaching countless individuals who have been the unexpected, yet fully appreciated, beneficiaries of an undying legacy.

I am eternally grateful to those of you who have shared with me ways that you have applied Dad's wisdom as well as sharing your own personal stories of wisdom that works. Wisdom that you may have learned from a beloved relative or mentor, wisdom that inspires you to be the best you can be.

It is through my writing today that I aspire to relay those stories and my personal journey that has subsequently evolved. It is through my writing today that I hope to share stories of more WISDOM THAT WORKS.

Stay tuned as I look forward to sharing this next chapter with all of you!

Mary

It's not just time for a new calendar in my life....it's time for a new compass heading as well. For the past five years, I've been sharing the wit and wisdom I learned from my father, the Butcher, with each of you. In fact, it's during that time that many of us became friends. You've supported me by reading my book, listening to me at keynote speeches, inviting me to book clubs and workplace events, following me on all our social media sites, even sharing emails and phone calls with me as a result of the impact my father's guidance had on your own lives.

But now my journey takes a turn. I'm shifting my direction a bit......getting a new compass heading. And it's all because of your requests for additional insight, for real time examples, for more depth and content.

In 2012, I'm dedicating my writing time to developing a new message series called "Wisdom That Works." I'm taking my father's wit and wisdom - the stories and guidance you're all familiar with -- and translating it to today's real life challenges. You might say I'm trading in Dad's well worn roadmap for a digital GPS, but the destination remains the same: the pursuit of life's happiness and success.

As you might have guessed, I have finally figured out where I am headed with regards to my next book. Thanks to all of you who have shared your thoughts as to how you have applied Dad’s wisdom (and to all of you who show me the way by the way you lead and live your lives each day) my new book is now in the works. Stay tuned because this year I'll be sharing excerpts regularly with you right here on my blog.

Until next time, I wish you an inspired New Year!

Woke up this morning a bit melancholy as I am thinking of the many happy memories from our past Bichelmeyer Christmas gatherings.

Memories of Christmas Eve at Mom & Dad’s celebrating Jimbo’s birthday and our name drawing gift exchange with the inevitable “OVER THE LIMIT” shout outs.

Watching the “Christmas Play” each year with the same script but different children playing the part of Mary, Joseph and the baby Jesus as well as all the three wise “men” and all the Sheppard’s in their costume of towels (that I knew I would be washing and folding later).

The “Do You Hear What I Hear” moment I waited for all night when all of your beautiful voices came together in that perfect moment in song.

Memories during my early teenage years of wrapping Cindy’s many gifts from Jerry after his last minute dash to the mall on Christmas Eve dreaming of the day I would have a boyfriend who loved me as much as Jerry loved Cindy and thinking that Jerry actually had excellent taste in women’s clothing.

Memories of waking up on Christmas morning and rushing out to find my “pile” of presents all unwrapped and on display from “Santa” knowing Mom did not get a wink of sleep the night before yet that turkey dinner would be ready with all the fixins later in the day and it would not be until everyone else was content and settled post gifts and feast that she would find some time to nap on the sofa with her favorite afghan wrapped around her later that day. It was then (if I was lucky) that I would get the coveted spot on the couch by her side and we would just be still after all the merriment of the holiday.

These are the memories that wash over me as I wait for Scott and my boys to wake up this Christmas morning and the festivities to begin at the Lucas household.

I hope and pray that years from now as Chase & Nick look back at our holiday traditions and memories that they feel as much love and warmth and comfort from their childhood Christmas memories as I do from mine.

Thank you all for your part in my story.

I love you more than words can tell and hope to see each of you at the Bichelmeyer Family Christmas Gathering on January 1.

In the meantime wishing you a Merry Christmas Day with your special families and the joy of making your own memories.

Cheers!

Mary

Happy Holidays, Season's Greetings, Joyeux Noel and Merry Christmas to one and all!




Everyone loves to receive an invitation, and the Christmas season is full of them. Open house invitations in our neighborhood, dinner invitations with long time friends, and festive party invitations to celebrate the season....with my favorite red dress and a champagne cocktail.

This year, I've been lucky enough to have many invitations come my way as a result of my book, Lunchmeat & Life Lessons: Sharing a Butcher's Wisdom. Here's a peek at 2011 in review:

• Kansas City area speaking opps: Our hometown community continues to invite The Butcher's Wisdom into their lives, and I met several new friends as a result of my presentations to area schools, professional associations, local businesses and networking groups. A very special thank you to Barnett Helzberg for welcoming me to the Helzberg mentoring (HEMP) organization.

• Keynote addresses to national associations and high profile organizations: Speaking engagements across the country found me in Chicago for the American Heart Association's annual meeting, in New Orleans for the American Staffing Association's national conference, and even in Washington, DC to address the Federal Reserve with my father's wit and wisdom.

• Funds in support of the American Heart Association tribute center created in honor of my parents have now reached $18,000. I invite you to click on the Hearts We Leave Behind site to find out more and to consider donating generously.

• Career shift: After a five year sabbatical from full time work in the corporate world, I was asked to join the Staffmark organization as Chief Resource Officer this past summer. Staffmark is the undisputed staffing industry dynamo with over 300 offices in 32 states. I am now part of their executive leadership team and love every minute of it. To learn more, visit www.Staffmark.com

• One of the largest publishing houses in the country invited me to sign with them to give my book more "ooomph." After careful consideration, I declined, opting instead to make an impact with my father's life lessons the only way he knew how.....one person at a time. While I'm grateful for that opportunity, I know I made the right decision for the book, for its readers and for me.

• And to end the year on a high note -- and a British accent -- an invitation from across the pond in 2012. That's right. The Butcher's Wisdom will be presented in London next May, as I address the Recruitment and Employment Confederation World Employment Conference, the professional body representing the UK's international recruitment industry. Bangers and mash, anyone?

Exhausting, exhilarating, exciting all at once.

All of these events lead me to consider life's other invitations. Things we receive throughout the day, throughout the year, throughout our entire lives that we may not recognize as being special invitations. Yet indeed they are!

When we begin to view life's little "asks" as an engraved, gilt-edged invitation to throw open life's doors, behind them you'll find opportunity, abundance and gratification. Look closely to recognize these important invitations.....and say "I accept" whenever possible. These invitations represent life's daily possibilities to create new relationships and share new experiences. They are invitations to live life to the max.

As for me? That's easy. I invite each of you to enjoy time with those you love, a good book and champagne cocktail this Christmas season.

Cheers!

Mary

Greetings from 35,000 feet altitude!

"Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it." Ferris Bueller famously said that in the 1986 blockbuster comedy.....one of my favorites.

It's certainly moving fast for me right now. As I write this, my life is zooming along at exactly 450 mph high above the clouds in a Boeing 737. That's a good metaphor for the flurry of activity that surrounds me at present: Kids off to college, our annual Bichelmeyer family picnic, amazing new work assignments, friends and family struggling with health issues, increased travel, fighting to get eight hours sleep each nite.....and of course, new horizons presented because of my book, Lunchmeat & Life Lessons: Sharing a Butcher's Wisdom.

Let me share a few of those recent milestones with you here:

• The American Heart Association Heart.org/plannedgiving is now distributing the book to all those who are planning to include this wonderful organization in their estate planning. They honor me and my family in doing so, since both my parents died of heart disease. I've been very involved in the AHA in recent years, and they have been so supportive of me every step of the way. I'm honored that Lunchmeat & Life Lessons is impacting so many generous people willing to donate in an effort to end heart disease, the leading cause of death in the US today.

Click here to check out the Bichelmeyer Family Tribute Site www.heartsweleavebehind.com

• YouTube.com Update: We've really gotten noticed on our YouTube channel in recent months because we've uploaded several new clips from my own speaking engagements around the country to press interviews with mom and dad at our family home. Just last month, I was overwhelmed by the "six degrees of separation" idea when the book got a moving shout out on the national TV show, Dr. Drew.
Click Here to see Lunchmeat & Life Lessons mention on Dr. Drew

• Did you know that Lunchmeat & Life Lessons: Sharing a Butcher's Wisdom is now available as an audio book? Well, it is and here's the link to listen to an excerpt and to place an order:

Lunchmeat & Life Lessons: Sharing a Butcher's Wisdom Audio Book Lunchmeat Audio Book

What does all of this add up to? Much joy, much gratitude, and much more yet to accomplish. But for the next 90 minutes until we land in Cincinnati, I don't intend to do anything at all. I'm going to mentally, physically, psychologically slow down -- and as my father John Bichelmeyer, the Butcher would say -- "enjoy the ride."

I encourage each of you to do the same. Living life at lightning speed robs us of being present in the moment. From time to time you've got to put the brakes on, take a good look around, breathe. Only when we are fully ourselves, fully here and now, can we appreciate what's really important. And trust me, you don't want to miss it.

Til next time, here's to life in the slow lane!

My best,

Mary

Sunday Morning Labor Day Weekend

Quick post that I wanted to share in honor of Labor Day.

Below is a link to one of my new favorite videos of Seth Godin talking about ways to "Stand Out"

Click on this Link to see Seth Godin's TED Talk on Standing Out

I thought Seth shared some "remarkable" ideas for all of us to consider when we go back to work after this long holiday weekend.

That's all for now... again Happy Labor Day weekend everybody and as always wishing each of you ALL THE BEST!

Mary

P.S. Thanks to Seth I am inspired to figure out ways to STAND OUT when I go back to work on Tuesday but for now I am far more interested in heading to my family picnic to PIG OUT ... thus the short post!

Cheers!

WOW...

Three letters that describe how I have been feeling lately.

WOW… what talent!

I have been thinking as I find myself surrounded by such incredible people at work and over the course of my travels.

WOW… where does the time go?

I think to myself as I leave my baby boy at college alongside his older brother.Wasn’t it just yesterday that I was bringing him home to meet his beloved big brother?

WOW… did that just happen?

I say out loud when a courageous young woman my father never knew is quoting him on Dr. Drew? Click on the link below and you can watch the exchange that left me filled with an attitude of gratitude for the blessings of my family and of awe and compassion for the courage of these women.

Click Here to View the YouTube Clip from Dr. Drew

Yep.. it has been a week of WOWS and I have a feeling there are more WOW’s to come as I too take the time to wonder at the WOWS and “learn something from everyone I meet!”

Thanks to all of you for your interest in my story.

So looking forward to this next chapter.

My BEST!

Mary

Happy Birthday Dad!

Dad would have been 95 years old today.

Today in his memory I have attached a link to one of my favorite video clips of Dad sharing some food for thought & inspiration on the subject of happiness.

Dad on Happiness

Enjoy!

Happy Father's Day to all...
Moms, Kids, Uncles and Aunts Included!

"Because I have given, I have received so very much in return."

That quote is a favorite of mine, and it's given me some food for thought lately. In fact, I heard this same sentiment expressed just this week by one of Kansas City's most respected businessmen and philanthropists, Barnett Helzberg. When asked what his life's greatest joy is, he didn't hesitate to respond:

"The joy of giving back to others."

Before you read further, friends, take note: This is not a message on the importance of giving. Instead, I want you to consider the impact of giving, or what I call the "echo of giving."
Here's what I mean: I gave a speech a few years back following the publication of my book, Lunchmeat & Life Lessons: Sharing a Butcher's Wisdom. It wasn't my best presentation and I knew it. Worse, I knew the audience agreed with my assessment. I left the stage and my confidence fell through the floor. Why wasn't I more prepared? Why hadn't I projected more emotion? Why didn't I connect with my audience?

A moment later, a man came up to me and took both my hands in his. Who was this person? His presence startled me as I was lost in my own thoughts. I'll never forget his words:

"I don't know what you said or what your message was as you spoke to our group," he began. "I didn't hear a word of it. All I know is that you stood in front of us and told us you were going to share some wisdom from the greatest man you ever knew: Your father."

I could see where this was going... he was ready to clobber me for my ineffective keynote address. Here it comes, I thought!

But wait. No, that wasn't it at all. The stranger continued, looking me straight in the eyes:

"You see," he continued, "I'm a new father. I left my six week old baby girl for the first time this week so that I could come to this convention and all I could think of as you spoke for the last hour is how can I be the kind of father to my daughter that your father was to you? How can I create that love, loyalty and lasting impact in her life? Thank you for inspiring me to be the best father I can be."

I couldn't speak for a moment. I simply held his hands tighter.

He walked away and I knew that something incredible had happened. It didn't matter that I thought I had delivered a poor presentation. My words had connected with someone in a powerful way. I had given of myself -- and he had received.

So what about the echo of that giving? Undoubtedly that businessman went home with a new way of thinking. A changed direction in being a father to that new baby girl. A re-organized list of life's priorities. And I bet that echo resonates on to this very day. In turn, he gave of himself to another person who received and embraced that simple gift.

On and on it goes. The circle of life. The echo of giving.

Remember my own father's words as you give of yourself to others... you receive so very much in return. I know I did that day.

Finally, to that gracious new dad who touched both my hands and my heart back in 2006,
I wish you a very special Father's Day 2011.
All the best!

Mary B. Lucas

My sister Jeannie told me this story about Mom and I think it sums up what Mom thought about “passion” in a marriage...

Jeannie and her husband had made some changes to their house and asked Mom to come down for a visit. During the tour of the new construction, they were walking through the master bathroom when Mom noticed Jeannie’s tattered flannel nightgown hanging on the hook behind the door.

Mom looked at that nightgown, then looked at Jeannie. “Jean Marie is that what you wear to bed with your husband?”

Jeannie nodded sheepishly, clearly embarrassed by the question. “Yes, Mom.”

“Jean Marie, let me give you some advice,” Mom said in a firm but controlled tone. “If you want to have a happy marriage you NEVER wear flannel to bed.”

Although Mom and Dad’s marriage could definitely be described as passionate and fiery, I assure you they weren’t always in the “no flannel zone.” In fact she could be pretty hard on him, prompting him to tell her at times that they’d get along better if she would treat him as if he were one of her children.

Dad was right; Mom would always celebrate our homecomings. Whenever any of us would arrive home from school Mom was there to wrap us in her arms and shower us with hugs and kisses. That was not always the case with Dad’s homecomings, where he would sometimes chide her by saying “Hey, what about me?”

Just because Mom didn’t always greet Dad in the same way she welcomed us kids, doesn’t mean she didn’t anticipate his arrival. Every evening around five o’clock Mom would splash on a little Shalimar Perfume and grab one of those pencils used to mark the packages at the meat market to fill in her brows.

Sometimes Mom would even put on some of the Mary Kay make-up she had bought from her friend Penny and she always clipped on a pair of earrings. Then she would have all of us kids line-up, kind of like the Von Trapp family, ready to give our Daddy plenty of hugs and kisses.

Those are my memories of Mom at her best with Dad. I might also add that Mom would be the first to admit that as a couple they also had some not so great times.

One time I told Mom about a couple I knew that was getting divorced. "What happened?" Mom asked.“I guess they are getting divorced because they have had a bad few years and can’t seem to get past it.” I speculated.

“A bad few years?” she asked indignantly. “That’s nothing! Your Father and I have had bad years - heck we have had bad decades but I would not trade the life we share now as parents, grandparents and great grandparents for anything in the world.”

Good decades, bad decades... I'd say that given the fact that Mom and Dad were married for over SIX decades and had ten kids, I think we can safely assume that there were plenty of nights when Mom followed her NO FLANNEL rule!